Creative Composition: What the Ending Should Have Been

This thread is for all of you who think that the ending to Creative Composition was bad, or wrong, or forced, or too abrupt, or just not in keeping with the rest of the story. I invite all of you to speak your mind, and offer your opinion about how the story should have ended.

I make no promises about changing the ending, but if the arguments are compelling enough, or there is enough agreement on an ending, then I might be willing to consider amending the final chapter. Having said that, that doesn't mean that I'm automatically going to give in to a collection of incurable romantics who have to have a happy ending in every story. Life isn't like that; if you want happy endings, read The Benefits of Friends.

I enjoyed the story very much and my thought would be that you do one more chapter and find that after looking for and looking for Mrs. Bell he finds her and their child and they get together and live happily ever after or he at least has some part in their lives. I believe that it is only fair as she lost her job as a result of her pregnancy by him and also lost her husband. I do hoe that you will add that additional chapter. I guess that I am just an old softie and always lake a happy ending.

Jim Fulton

Whether "we" liked the ending does not really matter. This is your story, not a story written by committee. This story did what a good story should do, it engaged the reader. Some may not like the ending, but none of us went through the creative process that you did to develop the story. Ideas and suggestions from readers are often helpful to an author but that does not mean that we should drive the process. Again this is your story, YOU decide where it goes. GOOD JOB.

I was impressed with this story The stories that came out of the 16 year old protagonist's brain were impressive. The effect that they had on his subject (and teacher) were not surprising. If I were an early twenties (?) English teacher I would have been bowled over to have a freshman write that emotional and erotic a story starring me. But, as she pointed out, this was very dangerous. If the affair were discovered, she would have lost her job and probably gone to jail (it is not stated where this takes place--most, but not all, jurisdictions place the age of consent at 18). Her husband could lhave come home at any time. He was lucky to have his first sexual experience with such a loviing, expereinced woman. But where could it have gone from there? He had three yeara of school to finish. They could not continue the affairat the school They would surely be caught. They could not leave suddenly--he had parents and was a minor, and she had a job. Memory Heap ended the affair at the correct spot. He had a lot of living to do before he was ready have a wifw and child. If this were real life, I cannot see what other choice they could have had. They did not use protection, and she paid for it.

Several great stories have given multiple endings at various times. This would give you the opportunity to explore all of the alternatives which your fine story has set up.

I admit I like happy endings and would like to see the main characters get together at the end. Having said that I could certainly see an ending where he finds her and they do not get together or she has remarried or some such. The ending was just to abrubt and did not match the pace of the rest of the story. My biggest issue however it the idea that she just dissappeared and is not findable. With enough money you can find anyone these days unless they go completely off the grid. This was one of the most unsatisfying endings I have ever read. I hope you will consider an alternate ending.

As someone that sent Memory Heap one of those emails, let me explain my thoughts. It’s not usual for me to write up an author and complain. And I actually like Memory Heap and have recommended The Benefits of Friends to other people.

I need to make clear first of all that I’m not disappointed in the slightest that the two characters didn't end up together. That happens. I was actually rather expecting that given the nature of the affair. There was certainly enough warning given to the readers. I'm not gnashing teeth because the author didn't give me the happy ending I wanted.

Melancholy endings are fine with me. I understand why an author goes there. Not everything will be happy, and it's a powerful emotion to pull from the audience.

My problem is basically that the ending is so rushed and ill-considered. It was a case of the story being over, and perhaps we’d get a sweet ending since it’s still going…and oh, big turnabout, there was a baby. The story is not over. We got a false ending, and things just heated up again. What’s going to happen now?

But then it is over. Two paragraphs after the story re-starts we get “The End”. Nothing happens. Wait! What?

I would have actually been fine if the story ended with the main character moving away and never seeing or hearing from her again. That’s a resolution. It’s not a happy ending, but that’s fine. In a sense, the story either went a chapter too long, or was at least a chapter too short. What you produced was a story cut off in the middle. The worst of both worlds. Unsatisfying as either a happy or less happy ending. Poor quality from a writer who knows better.

How would I have ended it? Since you asked here are a few ideas:

1. Mega happy ending where they get together again and she squirts out two more kids.
   
2. End it with the main character moving away and looking back on Mrs. Ball as a sweet memory.
   
3. Have the main character fall in love with someone else. Maybe even Debbie. Let the relationship with Mrs. Ball slowly fade away until they end it mutually after one last night.
   
4. They meet again at the reunion. They slide into bed out of habit and the story ends with both characters at a crossroad for how they'll proceed.
   
5. Have the main character find out about the pregnancy and track down Mrs. Ball, only to find her happily remarried and his daughter calling another man “daddy”. He leaves without disrupting her life again. Switch to his daughter’s POV for the epilogue. On her 18th birthday, she receives a letter. In it the main character writes her a letter explaining himself, why he didn't come into her life, and how much his mother meant to him in their brief time together. Ending with assuring her that even if he was too young to be sure at the time, now he knows she was born out of love, no matter how brief.

Anyway you want to go really. It doesn't have to be a certain way to make me happy. I just don’t like the feeling that the story got suddenly cut off.

jrwhl12 wrote:

Whether "we" liked the ending does not really matter. This is your story, not a story written by committee. This story did what a good story should do, it engaged the reader. Some may not like the ending, but none of us went through the creative process that you did to develop the story. Ideas and suggestions from readers are often helpful to an author but that does not mean that we should drive the process. Again this is your story, YOU decide where it goes. GOOD JOB.

This person is 100% correct. That said I am one of the people who posted a comment sparking this debate. I didnt like the ending nor (as someone else here mentioned) did I like the fact that it ended in a flash. but as the person above stated should this matter?

So my question is why does it bother you? If you are writing because you want to elicit this sad emotional response at the end of this story then so be it, you will have to take the negative press that comes with it! If you are writing because you want to entertain people then surely the mass respose should tell you that the end was not favourable and the entertainment value diminished.

I am a reader, my English lit skills suck and I cannot write for toffee, so I cannot tell you what you should or should not write? However as a reader and I am asked to vote on a story I'm reading. My vote like so many others I'm guessing was not what you wanted? My comment then and now explains my reasons for this, how you address that is entirely up to you?

Like I said. Almost an amazing story

Steve

MH:

Greetings my friend. I have been out of pocket for a couple of weeks and had not gotten on-line as much as I would have liked. When I did get on, I find this quagmire!

Dear Readers! While the idea of the happy ending is always desired by the majority of readers, this story seems truncated only because if you really look at the story, this is just a slice of life!!!!

Remember, dear reader, that there is a 10 year span where the writer had had many other life issues, obviously after further schooling became a novelist. A book signing brings him to his old home town and since there is a class reunion, avails himself of an opportunity to possibly rekindle an acquaintance with his former teacher. His memories are diving such a meeting.

Now the reunion is in full swing and he does not find the person he most wants to see! Enter his old nemesis who sees his furtive scans and correctly determines the cause. The reason she provides our hero with the story of the pregnancy could have any sort of reason behind it, that is up to you to decide. However, our hero is nonplussed with this knowledge and after admitting his liaison with Mrs. Ball, ends the evening and departs.......Now you want more at this point.

Well, as in real life, he decides (at some point AFTER the reunion) to make an attempt to find his paramour and the possible child. Now we know at least 10 years have intervened, and very possibly more. His search ends with a blank after the initial departure data was used.........What more could he do? Yes he COULD have gone into a funk and expended mountains of money to seek this lady and child but to me the inference was that competent private detectives were at a dead end......This happens!!!! One could speculate, of course, but the story is MH's and as such, we will just have to accept that she was lost!!!!!

Off my rant,

Is it okay if I hate Memory Heap for his ability to write a freakin' 8 page, 4,000+ word ending to a story in a day?

This person is 100% correct.

I find his point to be a rather simplistic response requiring no thought. Every piece of fiction ever created is someone's baby. And the vast majority of it is unreadable/unwatchable.

The original Superman movie would have aged a lot better if someone had walked in and told the writers/director not to do the fly really fast to make the world spin backwards and turn back time thingy (or his amnesia kiss in Superman 2). Or how neither Spielberg nor Kubrick(!) had the wisdom to realize A.I. Artificial Intelligence was not going to work by stretching so far for a sentimental happyish ending. Or Harry Potter's embarrassing Epilogue. Or The Sapranos's ridiculous and pretentious ending.

Things happen and all artists mess up from time to time. Even masters like Spielberg and Kubrick. In my opinion, Memory Heap committed an error during the ending. Apparently, I was far from alone in thinking this.

Yes he COULD have gone into a funk and expended mountains of money to seek this lady and child but to me the inference was that competent private detectives were at a dead end......This happens!!!!

Honestly, I'm gonna have to swallow that one and live with it. Because that doesn't just happen. Not in this day and age. Unless you're actively avoiding detection or someone has made you disappear, a small team of quality detectives are going to find you. Even if you do move to Hungary for awhile.

Really, my bigger problem with that idea would be that "real" doesn't have to get in the way of a good story. Who cares if something conforms to reality if it diminishes the quality of a story? I mean, Michael Corleone could have chocked on an orange before the climax of the Godfather. It would have been arguably "real", but it would have made for a rather odd end to the movie and less satisfactory than the one we got.